My Childhood God vs. the Intimate Bride

lil girl churchAs a child, my brothers and I were taken by the hand and walked to church every Sunday morning by our Mother.  We enjoyed summer Bible schools, the activities, the friends and it’s safe to say that church for me was a social activity and little more.  I attended church services most of my life and yet knew nothing of God’s love, His compassion, His mercy nor His personality. I did however, know stories about Him; I knew about Him yet I never knew Him.

I would describe my Childhood God as:

-Far away

-Old

-Stern

-Mysterious

-Hard to reach

-All-powerful

-Unknown

-Foreign

-Impersonal

Perhaps these labels sound familiar to you as well, but He doesn’t have to stay that way and He desires so much more.  I had no idea or knowledge that I could have a relationship with such a Mighty One!

Over the past ten years, He’s revealed Himself to me; He’s brought anointed people to teach me and to give me tools to live by.  He’s allowed loss and pain and unimaginable changes in my life and in me.  At the end of these past ten years, I can now look back and say, although hard, it’s been a good life and I’m still learning to adjust day-by-day.

The Lord has anointed and commissioned me to “Teach them what to do so that they may be more at ease with Me.”  In this blog, as He leads me, I’ll be sharing some of my personal daily journal entries, some of my dreams, some of my visions, some of my personal words from Him, some of my poems, fascinating book recommendations and significant quotes.

Journal entry May 07

jj brickwall“Where am I and how do I feel?  I have no idea where I’m going or what I’m to do except for now I’m to abide, to trust and to wait.  It’s a strange place this place, it’s here and it’s now, it’s fun and it’s scary, it’s busy but at times it’s very lonely.  It’s NOwhere and it’s NOW here – see, how strange it is?

I’ve almost no identity.  I have exercise class, I have church, my household chores and very little family interaction.  Mostly, I have my husband, my daughter and my brother and for right now that’s okay, I think.

What do I need?  I do not know except only more of the same, I need to continue to abide, to trust and to wait while being content.  I’m letting my soul grow up and so here I am, I remain in NOwhere and yet in NOWhere.”

 Come back and let Him teach you, let Him love you, let Him strengthen you and most importantly, let Him reveal Himself to you.

I’ll leave you with this quote, “During the winter the trees “appear” dead; they are not so in reality but on the contrary, are submitting to a process that preserves and strengthens them.  For what is the effect of winter?  It contracts their exterior, so that the sap is not uselessly expended and it concentrates the strength on their roots, so that new roots are pushed out and old ones are strengthened and nourished and forced deeper into the soil.  Alas, the tree was never more alive and is becoming more firmly established.”  Madam Jeanne Guyon